I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
