No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
