Got a toothbrush?
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
