thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
