My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
