i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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