return my video game
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Two words: blizzard sex
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Randomize
