your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
