i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
