some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
