Im at strip club and am horny
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
