At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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