The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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