i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize