loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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