There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize