i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
