Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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