He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize