I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
