YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
