you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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