(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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