new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize