Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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