where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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