ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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