please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
