so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
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