is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
