Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
