You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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