RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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