I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Randomize
