so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
