Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
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They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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