Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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