operation have a gay friend backfired
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
