Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize