Its about making memories worth repressing
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize