she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
