Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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