He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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