Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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