For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
