I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Randomize