I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
