Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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