You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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