She said her name was "party"
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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