i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
